Saturday, January 17, 2009

A Paragraph Peek

I'm finally getting brave enough to post a snippet from my WIP, the Lithuanian folktale. Please be very liberal with your judgement--it's a really rough first draft. Though at least it gives one the idea of the voice (thus far). Happy reading!

A soft creak in the corner of the porch caught her attention before her knuckles more than brushed the wooden door. Dalia spun to face the oldest woman she had ever seen, rocking slightly in a chair. The woman was bent, covered in three shawls in various degrees of shabbiness. She appeared attentive to something straight ahead. Dalia turned to see what arrested the old woman’s gaze. Nothing was there that she could see and assuming that the old woman had not noticed her, the young girl cleared her throat.

The expression on the old woman’s face did not change, nor did her intermittent rocking and gaze eastward.

Senele,” stammered Dalia, timorously, addressing the woman as she would a grandmother.

The old woman ceased rocking and though she did not face her, she cocked her ear to one side, as if to listen to her visitor.

Dalia clearer her throat once more, this time to urge her voice forward, louder. “Senele, I am looking for the goodly Ragana that lives here.”

The old woman’s lips parted in a toothless smile and in a dusty voice, rasped, “Now why ever would a gentle thing like thee be in search of them?”

The ancient woman turned her head to the girl and sightless eyes weighed her. For it was then that Dalia noticed the woman was blind, her eyes dimmed underneath their clouded irises.

Not them, Senele, I seek only one, the goodly witch who might help me heal my mother,” said Dalia, thinking the woman old and confused.

The woman did not correct herself, but rocked slightly, mulling the girl’s words as she chewed her tongue.

“There are three witches that live here, ones thou would do well to avoid.”

You probably can't tell much about the story by this page, but it's obvious there's something wrong with our main character's mother. That's made this whole first section so hard to write for me because it's too near home. My mother is battling stage III ovarian cancer right now and I have to catch myself lately, as I write, from crying. I suppose it'll help my writing because I feel what Dalia's feeling at this point in my life, but it's also making for difficult writing days. I just don't want to go where my heart is taking my writing right now. And yet I know I have to go, so I will continue. And like my mother fighting the cancer, I will persevere!


  1. hmmm... cant tell much from that snippet, you should post more. :)

  2. You have to be patient, dear sister, it's way too rough to show off. :)